This came to mind from a post in a forum, where there are several ongoing games.  One of the referees was apologizing for his failure to respond to recent game posts.  It happens.  I miss a day here and there, and I count running the game part of my job, the playtesting of new game worlds and new ideas, as well as the demonstration of how the game plays and how to run it.  I never hold absence against anyone (although I do appreciate it when players at least let me know that they’re still alive and planning to play again).  What struck me about this post was the referee’s reason for his continued absence, and failure to post to the game on that day as well.  He said he had had a lot on his mind and was in a bad mood.

  This is not one of my big problems, really.  I’m generally rather steady in my moods (steadily depressed, perhaps, but steady), and don’t have too much trouble setting aside my problems when it’s time to play.  Not that I’m perfect, mind.  On at least two occasions I have fallen asleep from exhaustion while running a game, and I’ve fallen asleep while playing more than once as well.  I have my foibles; this just isn’t one of them.  Yet it is a problem I’ve seen; I think the referee was wise not to run the game while he was in whatever darkened state of mind he was.  There is a referee around here (not someone whose name I know, but I’ve seen his games as he runs them in a public place) who is marked by his moodiness.  It is said that if he’s had a bad week, he’ll kill all the player characters; and then the next week, he’ll resurrect them all and give them incredible goodies, treasures, powers, particularly if he’s feeling good.  I’ve wondered why his gaming group stays with him.  It can’t just be that good referees are all that hard to find.  Perhaps its because when he’s in a good mood he’ll let them do just about anything they want, so they live with his completely destructive bad moods.

  Thus, although it is not something with which I have much trouble, I see some value in raising the question of how to keep our moods from spoiling our games.

  The idea of not playing when you’re in a bad mood is certainly a good idea, if you can do it.  For many of us, though, ruining the game by our absence is as egregious as ruining it by our presence.  The referee is not always the only person at the table who is indispensable.  Most games have their key players and key characters, those whose absence cripples the game and means we cannot play this week.  Certainly if you’re really in a rotten mood and you can get out of the game, it’s better to let people play without you than to spoil it for everyone.  Similarly, if you can play a different game, or get someone to cover for you, these are all ways to save everyone some aggravation.  They are, for some of us, pipe dreams.  The game needs us, and everyone is counting on us, and bad mood or good mood, we’ve got to be there.

  So cheer up.  That’s the next obvious option, isn’t it?  Get yourself into a good mood.  Do something that will relax you and clear your mind.  Get ready to play.  Everyone has things that cheer them.  I like to sing a bit sometimes; I can watch a video tape of a familiar movie or television show.  Maybe there’s a quick game of something else you can play to unwind a bit.  When we first started role playing, we almost always played something else first, every night we played.  Pinochle was our particular fancy, but our group was most commonly two couples so that worked well.  Board games were another starter.  We used games as appetizers before the meal of role playing, and it broke some of the ice and got us in the mindset of playing.

  That won’t always work, either.  I could write a hundred columns on ways to lift your spirits, and yet I know there have been times when I have been so down and depressed that nothing could cheer me.  It is at times like that when you have to go forward in the only sensible way possible.  You have to have fun without letting your mood get in the way.

  That may not sound either sensible or possible, but it is.  Remember, you’re there with other people, presumably friends, or people who want to be friends.  You’re sharing time together.  As we remembered in Togetherness, this is a social gathering, a party of sorts, and everyone is here to have fun.  Involve yourself in the festivities, in the fun, in the play.  Do what you would do if you felt better.  I’m not saying that will make you feel better; but it will help keep everyone else from feeling worse.

  To this end, if you’re the referee, it helps to play close to the rules.  If you’ve already got the habit of relying on the dice to guide the outcome, play isn’t going to be particularly different this week just because you’re not feeling so chipper; nor will it be so especially different next week when you’re doing better.  Rules provide a framework for consistency.  The more freeform your games are run, the more impact your mood is likely to have on them.

  If you’re the player, it may help to be a bit more immersive (whatever that means) when you’re down.  If you can sense more what the character thinks and feels at those moments, you can be less influenced by your own emotions in his choices.  It also helps to give thought to how to keep his conduct consistent.  He, after all, has a history of activity behind him, and he’s unlikely to break with that significantly without good cause.  That history can be to the player the objective standard that the rules are to the referee:  the thing that provides a sense of consistency to the game.

  Maybe I’m talking out of turn here.  After all, I’ve admitted that my moods don’t much impact my actions as referee or player.  However, maybe these thoughts are at least part of why that is.  Maybe I have some ideas about how to handle moods so they don’t so much matter, and don’t spoil it for everyone else.

  Next week, something different.

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M. Joseph Young is co-author of Multiverser and Vice President for Development at Valdron Inc.  His many contributions to online literature are indexed for convenience, and he looks forward to discussing these things by e-mail or on our Gaming Outpost forums.